security blankets

Been noticing the change in the way i see home.

Not having been able to visit my usual places this time around, i experienced a major sense of withdrawal and panic- it had almost become ritual for me to visit what used to be my local grocery store, the Thai restaurant i used to eat lunch at in college, the boat basin that i can see from my sister's window across the water; the endless ma and pa coffee shops that always took me in whenever i needed a place to be undecided and pensive- these places defined me and kept me safe. 

The thought of going back to my new home without properly paying homage to my old home was unsettling and, to put it simply, just made me plain sad.  It was also disconcerting to not have been able to experience all the newness that is what makes the city today- galleries and parks unvisited are now left to my imagination and a longing for the 'next time' that i'll come back, hoping they'll still be around at that point.
What did give me a sense of peace and quietude was the amount of time I got to spend with family and the even the little bit that I got to spend with friends tonight and in little spurts throughout our stay here. It made me beam just thinking about how all these beautiful people lend their streaks of bright shiny color to make up the skyline that will forever be my home home.

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